This past week

this past week....i don't really know what to say about this past week....
I basically need your prayers.....

I found myself glued to the Casey Anthony trial......I don't know why....It's a very interesting case but I found myself slipping into depression....
How any mother could even think about harming her child is completely beyond comprehension. .....The fact that I was actually glued to the television set is another reason I think I was depressed.....

But My God is still there for me....I have a Lot of Light to share...and I know that I can't share it..while I'm vegetating in front of a screen......I think when I get my house....I won't have a television at all.....most news is bad news....

On a postive note, I worked on music this week! :) I'm so excited about finally getting back into music....Jesus spoke to me in church the previous Sunday...He told me thru someone that my writing and singing were going to be anointed! I"m so very happy about that. I knew it all along, but it is always wonderful to have someone confirm something ....

Ok...here's where things get tough...I've been separated for a year....so much drama! I have been through the mud in this marriage! Yesterday, I said a prayer, "Jesus, please show me something." Please......

Well, today He showed me something. I found out that my husband has indeed been talking to another woman.....I don't know if it is "innocent" but in my opinion, married people should have "secret" friends....even if they are separated....It is shady and wrong!

I have dealt with the "secret" friend issue for far too long! I have endured mistrust, lies, you name It...

NO MORE!

I am worth more! I can't spend my life wondering what someone is doing and who he is doing it with....

It's too much...

Thank you Jesus for showing me......

Am I sad? A little....I am hurt........But I am ready to move on and file for divorce....

I don't know what else to do....Adultery is Adultery...lost trust is lost trust...
Our society is so corrupt that this is what it comes down to....
Do I advocate divorce?

NO! I have been financially abused, lied to, cheated on...you name it! And I still believe in working things out! But I asked Jesus to show Me, and He showed me....My husband is talking to another woman....

Oh well,

His Loss...

I have Jesus and He is all I need...

I have two boys. I am young. If I ever do this again...I will find me a Christian man that truly loves Jesus....I will not sleep with anyone again until I am married....
I will find someone who honors God, and then honors me and my children...

Please say some prayers for me....

On another note, I did have a chance to help out with a mission trip....
A friend of mine is going to Nicaragua in March of next year.
She makes pillow case dresses for orphans..
She told me about her experiences at the orpanage..
She said that some children are found at a local dump site...
How sad...I am amazed and hurt by people's cruelty...
I want to cry!
I am sending her some bears to take with her when she goes....
She is sending me a list of items to donate so if anyone is interested in helping out with these children, please email me or message me....

I turned on the news last night....maybe I should just stop watching it altogether...
A four year old boy in Texas ..was choked...and thrown out of his dad's car on the side of the interstate... The little boy was found walking along I-20....thankfully, someone saw him in the dead of night and picked him up..
He was found with 500 shards of cacti stuck in his little body...
His dad, who was later caught by police, said "God made him do it.."
Not the God I know!

UGH!
Why!
What can I do?
Sad, just sad...

Dear Lord,

Cover the innocent with your shield of mercy...
Let them Know your great Love,
Shine your Light upon thier tiny hearts
Let them know that you are there in their midst
Let them know, Lord, that you are thier comforter
in this wicked and corrupt world...
Dear Lord, thank you...
Amen